Friday 26th of April 2024
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Re: Bullying in Education and Society

The Government has in the past pledged millions of dollars in order to combat bullying in schools but as per usual it all goes to waste as things are getting worse, not better.

My son started a new school this year. This is his 4th school and he is 7 years old and the most sensible child I have ever come across, he is in Year 2. The reasons for the moves have differed and in one case it was a house move but what my son tells me disturbs me.

At every school we have been to we have had to make formal complaints about bullying and violent behaviour in the playground and classroom. Violence and aggression that is not acknowledged and is being ignored and allowed to continue. My son has told me and I have also observed and noticed a behavioral pattern of violence and bullying at every school and that the violence is growing and escalating. We have also noticed that the schools and teachers do not respond or react to the violence in an appropriate manner as that they seem to see it as an acceptable standard and level of behaviour. Problem is that this is a not just boys being boys etc, this is violence and bullying that just isn’t being identified for what it really is. The general thought process is that “life is tough and kids need to get used to it

Re: Bullying in Education and Society

My son is now 20 yrs old, and various forms of bullying have accompanied his education experience, as they did mine, but the kernel of it is perceived though our fearless leaders. Although its microcosm is the playground, the macrocosm lies in the governance that we all lie down and take up the ****.

Neither parents or teachers, well intentioned as they may be, can make any headway against the repression of any kind of 'softness'. This 'hard line' mode is rampant in the current rhetoric of control. The mindset we find ourselves trying to live in demands that there are bullies (captains of industry, scientists, PMs, league footballers etc) who demand our submission. That is the model, and if you don't like it, then you must be, oh, let's see, un-Australian?

The funded education system we have is a reflection of the intentions of the government that funds it, and this government is diametrically opposed to the education of children being anyting other than the production of automatons, cannon fodder, wage slaves and junkies.

Sorry to be so cynical about it, but, I have been a teacher, and I have listened to the music the kids are hearing, and they are as depressed about it as I am. My fondest hope is that the kids will rise up against us and pull out our feeding tubes. We deserve it - we took our eye off the ball. We have failed to maintain the benefit of our freedom we assumed.

For every bully in the playground there are a dozen ground down kids. We need to teach them that there is resistence in numbers. Teach them how to identify each other, how to organise, to band together and resist passively. It is a very powerful thing for a lot of kids to just stand there and say no. In my experience, the bullies back off and think twice.

But it can only be taught by example - their parents have to have the same conviction, and provide proof. If the parent is impotent, so will the child be impotent. If the parent is passive to government bullying, so will the child incorporate that into its socialisation.

Just a thought.

Duty of Care

Annette you are so right, the hard line mode is a form of control and we are controlled and taught by this method from the moment we are born, so that it is seen as the norm. Bullied by the process and systems that are put in place by our Government.

I believe that the system of hard-line works by desensitizing humans starts from a moment a child is born and is consistently in our face. That is why there is so much violence and corruption on TV. So that we get used to it!

As parents we are taught to leave our babies to cry as they have to learn routine! The baby doesn’t understand why nobody will come to him when he is need. As parents we are told that “Children should be seen and not heard

School Bullying

As a primary school teacher it breaks my heart to hear about your experiences. There isn't any excuse for no action, and I know that is not the situation in the school I work in.

However - I do have some ideas about why it is happening, and some suggestions for what you might do. A lot of the why is about poor parenting skills and teacher overload. I haven't yet met a bully who came from a stable, supportive and happy home, where rules are applied fairly and consistently. And because so many kids come from dysfunctional families teachers and administrators get overloaded in trying to meet their social and developmental needs, as well as meet the educational outcomes that are required. This is still not an excuse for not doing anything. Smaller class sizes would help, but it's not a realistic goal for an individual to achieve.

My suggestion - get active. Keep talking to your son and follow up every incident with the school - do it in writing if you don't get the response you want. Join the school board or the P and C. Search the net for examples of schools with innovative anti-bullying initiatives. Look particularly for restorative justice practices - this seems to be particularly effective, and forward them to the principal and the school board. Don't put up with it - keep complaining, keep asking what is being done. Neither you or your son deserve to be ignored. Private or public - it is your school system, and you have the right to expect your child to be safe.

RE: Duty of Care

Roseanne01, I agree with you that there is a lot of bad parenting out there. I also think that there is a lot of bad teaching out there and a lot of bad leadership out there and a lot of bad discipline out there. Just to name a few.

I think bullies come from all sections of the community. Bullies can be borne in the playground, in the workforce, in the Government and in the community. It’s not always the parents or homes fault.

These days, perfectly normal parents from perfectly normal homes tell their kids to hit back, they do this because nothing else works. These kids are victims fighting back in order to defend themselves, not bullies. But how do you then differentiate and who do you blame?

You tell your kid to kick back because telling them otherwise would mean to have to tell your children to accept being treated unfairly and badly. There is so much malice, racism and discrimination.

Everybody understands why parents get overloaded. Everybody understands why teachers get overloaded, everybody understands why systems get overloaded, but overload is not a good enough excuse to fail in our duty of care.

I think it’s great that your school wouldn’t allow this type of behaviour and I take my hat of to you as I know it is not easy. I wish your school was close so that my son and daughter could go there. This is what is so frustrating, we know that in some areas and in some schools this isn’t tolerated and things are great. If all schools get funded equally, then that means that it is not the money that makes the difference!

We need to learn to identify those that really don’t enjoy doing their job and/or those who appear to have a dislike for their job and give them the option to change or to leave!

Bullying in Schools

Jolanda, I didn't mean to imply that parents were the only concern. You are absolutely right that there is bad teaching, bad administration of teaching and even worse, a lack of passion for getting it right for our kids. You will be surprised to know that our school has the same issues with bullying as most schools, and we still have parents who are angry and feel helpless to support their own children, and teachers who are frustrated that it is so difficult to achieve positive results. However, we never ignore it! We don't tolerate bullying and violence, but it still happens, although it is both less often and less severe than a few years ago. We have systems in place to handle the children who bully, and alternative programs for them that are helping to build their self-esteem (which is just one underlying issue). We have a counsellor and we spend a lot of time educating our kids on the impact of bullying and violence. We take a multi-pronged approach, and are constantly reviewing our practice to find better ways that work for everyone concerned.

I don't know of any single action that can solve this issue, but I do hear your frustration and I urge you not to give up. Some schools will not like you complaining, but it is your right in a democratic society to have your voice heard. I have worked with people who think I am too soft, because I genuinely try to care about even my most difficult students. My students know I will be there for them, but they also know that I don't tolerate violence, or any form of intimidation. There are consequences, but there is also support, for all of them.