There were movements down in Mayo when the memo got around that the kickbacks, through neglect, had leaked away. Brown trousers? More than likely, Downer lost a thousand pounds, and all of DFAT's cracks began to fray.

And Johnny, full of overflow, came down to lend his hand. It was grand to see a Canberra man astride all the gossip from the media, herding stories left and right, and defending all his ministers with pride.

This hardy little memo had been seen around before... Aussie dollars buying bullets in Iraq, but nobody said they'd seen it, and it safely slid away, to be hidden from the public in the dark.

But Lex and Pete had seen it, and Johnny Howard too, and then it disappeared again for years, to return, all proud and feisty, to the Government's surprise, and leaving Phillip Ruddock near to tears.

"Deny it" cried the riders, "round it up and herd it out – a coupla days and everyone will forget." But the memo kept on running, through the cities and the towns, reminding everyone of old regret.

So Johnny and his mountain-men, slumped upon their mounts, trotted back to Canberra in dismay, as the hardy little email, that in Downer raised the trots, left the cabinet's bright hopes in disarray.