Saturday 29th of January 2022

Lucky Dougie and Aussie cocky

Lucky Dougie and Aussie cocky

Exclusive payola

Mr Wood has been paid more than $250,000 for exclusive rights to his tale, to be broadcast on whenver whatever channel. The family spokesman said Mr Wood had no comment on whether a freed Swedish hostage led to his rescue. Oil broker Ulf Hjertstrom, 63, released from his 67-day kidnap drama on May, taken to US invaders after his release, told he shared a cell with Mr Wood.in the hands of ethical insurgents The Wood family's spokeswheel said Mr Wood would fudge his connection with Mr Hjertstrom on whenever night's television special.

Thanks to Dateline

SBS dateline exploded whatever semblance of veneer the Australian government and Douglas Wood had. See transcripts and cry as his other companions got killed... See my earlier blog on this subject...

Agent Doug kicks doors

After a long night session on the footy pies and free-flowing VB, with the Geelong Footy Club, and the near-completion of another business venture, Doug was at his peak. Then the batphone lit up. The tiny laughing skull graphic was not to be ignored. It was R of ASIO, the Boss. "Hang on, Phil." Doug was at the point of signing a great concept for the re-location of the problematic visiting coaches box at Skilled Stadium. The new box was OK- the Wood family bathing box - it was just that a couple of the whining babies thought Brighton Beach was too far from the ground. "Haven't any of you had to sit behind Brendan Nelson's head at the opera? It's no worse than that." Doug may have to let that one go, for now.

"Agent Doug, grab your fanny-pack, there's a raid on. Meet you outside the Melbourne HQ of the Liberal Party in 30 minutes. Get moving, we can talk while you drive". Agent Doug! Doug borrowed a Ferrari from another Old Boy, and he was off. Turns out this was an action against an extremist cult. The Sydney faction, led by Warring Ah, was at odds with the Melbourne branch, headed by spiritual leader Abu Kas Telo. They were indeed at each others throats, but R was on another track. He'd taken a page out of Trickie Dick's book of black ops, and, with one stroke, was going to cripple one mob, get their rivals blamed for it, and use the fear of imminent terrorism to add to his own budget. Absolute genius!

Arriving at HQ, Doug was suitably impressed by R's swanky kit. Doug wished he'd worn his Davy Crockett hat. They assigned two teams, one to bust the residence of Mikhail Crow Gur, the other to kick down doors in Camberwell, looking for Ken Ett. They knew they wouldn't have to face the Abu, but they *would* find evidence.

De-briefing, R promised Doug a spot on the next raid. "Mark your diary for August, we've got a joint job with George & Jeb, to bust Stem Cell Laboratories." The ugly sight of a de-briefed R reminded Doug that he is in a moral outrage about BB. 

Doug lifts the shirt

When he gatecrashes the Brother house tonight, Doug is doing it for the public good. Before he steps in the communal shower, the public is warned to avert its gaze, if the sight of genital warts and a hairy backside may cause offence.

This will be in a good cause, an assist to the brand new Senator Hurley, wearing the Citizenship guernsey for Labor. As Senator Hurley takes on Public Morality, her first task should be to ask The Age to explain why they wasted only one full page on the nudity in BBU.

Doug has a warning for Mr Beazley. If Labor does not take this matter more seriously, our society will collapse, laughing.

asylum grunted...

Two Iraqi service personnel who helped rescue an Australian contractor kidnapped in Iraq in 2005 have been given permanent refugee status in Australia.

Douglas Wood says he owes his life to Colonel Mohammed al-Samarae and the men who rescued him.

The engineer was held hostage for six weeks and was rescued by American and Iraqi soldiers.

Federal Minister for Immigration and Citizenship Chris Evans says the pair were given permanent refugee visas under Australia's humanitarian program.

He says there were genuine fears for the safety of the soldiers because of the role they played in Mr Wood's rescue.

For the past 18 months, Mr Wood has been lobbying Canberra on behalf of his Iraqi rescuers who are seeking asylum here.

Half a dozen times, Colonel Mohammed applied for a visa to come to Australia - three times in Baghdad and three times in Jordan. Each time he was turned away.

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see toon above and others like this one...