A French 1983 smart telephone card — picture by Gus Leonisky

Craig Thompson repeatedly provided false and misleading information during the course of a long investigation into the national office of the Health Services Union, a Fair Work Australia report has found.

In the movie "The Pirates in an Adventure with Scientists", the main pirate is a kind-hearted fool... He sinks the Beagle in a competition with some other pirates, but then sails Darwin back to England...

Lots of laughter and sharp jokes about science, apparently...

The bad joke here is that Tony Abbott is a sad annoying pirate — a fool who is still trying to sink the Beagle with no intention of saving Darwin from drowning... He can smell blood as Pirate Crook joins his team... He is taken aback a little by some of his bloodied crew — Pyne and Brough — who in their desire to sink the slipper, shot themselves in the foot... Idiots.

So, it has come to this. A decade, a state government inquiry and litigation and appeals through every level of the legal system to conclude the bleeding obvious: that company directors are required to tell the truth.

A former senior bureaucrat and expert on Aboriginal health was sacked when his employer learnt he had a 45-year-old conviction - for having sex with his girlfriend when he was a teenager.

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from the drum …..

Last week, Prime Minister Julia Gillard pondered what the "character and conduct" of the Anzac legend "did to shape our nation", and how "a worthy foe [Turkey] has proved to be an even greater friend".

Mr Pyne confirms the meeting took place but says he can "not remember" ever having requested Mr Ashby's mobile number.

"I don't remember ever having asked for Mr Ashby's number," he said. "I have met Mr Ashby on three occasions, and I have never had any need to phone him."

The Liberal Party powerbroker continues to deny he had any prior knowledge of the claims Mr Ashby made in the Federal Court documents or that he had ever had a discussion with the staffer over his concerns about Mr Slipper.

About the same time the mining magnate Clive Palmer announced he wanted to run against the Treasurer, Wayne Swan, at the next election - just as soon as he had finished building a life-size replica of the Titanic - the satirists of Australia received a memo. Their services would no longer be needed.

Humorists, wry commentators and the schooner-nursing jokester at your local pub would also be made redundant.

The reality of the political landscape has become so bonkers, it is better than anything even the most gifted wit could invent.

Consider, as merely one example, the Palmer candidacy.