Former speaker and expense claim savant Bronwyn Bishop has stepped up her claim that she wished to be re-elected to parliament to fight terrorism, volunteering to take up the front lines in the war against Islamic State.

Bishop, who was removed as Speaker following an expense scandal earlier this year, said she plans to redeem herself by leading a squadron of Eurocopter Tiger attack helicopters into the disputed territory on the Iraq and Syrian border and “eliminate all hostiles”.

“It feels like the most efficient way to redeem myself in the eyes of the Australian people,” Bishop claimed. “Yes, I understand their frustration. It wasn’t even entirely directed at me. It was that my actions were indicative of an out-of-touch ruling elite who will crack down on everyone but themselves. I understand that. But I think the obvious answer to winning back that trust is to take down the barbaric Islamic State forces single-handedly.

“I’ve always been committed to defending Australia against terrorist attack and if the best way for me to prove this is to go on the offensive myself then so be it. Think about it - we’ve tried everything to stop, scare and dissuade these radicals. It’s time to give them what they’re not expecting. Me, Bronwyn Bishop, leading a charge of attack helicopters to the tune of Ride of the Valkyries straight into their heartland.

“They’ll probably say things like ‘Gosh!’ and ‘Damn, we deserve this’ and even ‘Given the chance I would urge the Australian people to re-elect that valiant helicopter pilot’. That’s just my assumption but it’s true.

Bronwyn Bishop Volunteers To Lead Helicopter Squadron Against ISIS